Delighting In God Alone

It has been some time since I have written here or even in general to many of you my dear brothers and sisters back in the States. For many of you it is as if though I have fallen off the face of the earth or something. It is here and now I wish to speak to you all concerning why. It is my hearts desire that in the complete honesty of this post you may only be encouraged in your own journey with God and life spent in pursuit of His glory.

Some of you may already know how this past month and a half have been a most trying and difficult time for both my family and I. One such issue has been sickness. I have just spent the last month (literally the entire month) in the fight against one ailments after another (Sinus infection, Bacterial infection and food poisoning). It has been during this time that I have spent almost this entire month in bed and have lost an incredible amount of weight due to much of my symptoms and inability to keep food in. Both Misty (while also being pregnant) and Josiah have also succumbed to many infections as well. Elijah has been the most healthy of us all and even he just got over some sort of rash that came over his entire body striping him of all his energy. This has left us weak in more ways than one and we are thankful to report that we all seem finally on the mend.

Along with all this sickness has come much stress over visa situations, two trips out of the country, unknown and unplanned expenses, difficulties among the culture in which we live and family issues that come with all such moving around and not truly knowing what else is coming our way. 

Without going into all the details, I want to express to you all how utterly weak, spiritually depressed, hopeless, bitter and beat down all this has left me. I am ashamed and regret that this has become the outcome of such a trying month. However, it is in this regret and shame that the Lord is teaching me a huge lesson in our service for His glory here.

Being in a land not your own, among a language not your own, in a culture not your own is enough in and of itself and can add a great deal of stress on anyone. The loneliness in such a place as this can often bring great sadness upon many who work in such locations. Oh, how Misty and I long for the fellowship of other brothers and sisters as we once had with many of you. How we wish that there was a congregation that we could call family here. We are so desperate for true Christian community. We have such fond memories of you all. It has been a sweat reward and blessing to have been so close to you in true Christian community. You never truly realize how powerful fellowship in a local body (with all it's imperfections even) are until you don't even have such a choice or opportunity to meet in one. I pray that when Sunday morning roles around you see it for what it truly is. Namely a privilege, a gift and an honor.

Sadly in the course of this month my heart has also grown cold for my love of these people in which I serve as well. I am often lied to, taken advantage of and totally overcome by the corruption that seems to run so rampant within peoples lives here. on top of all this I have all around me the massive oppression of Islam constantly in my face screaming at me to conform, much like a drop of water that drips over and over again until it drives a man mad. In the course of this month I have felt that these people are the most rude, disrespectful, oppressive people I have ever come to ever meet and therefore, I have often placed my attentions back on thoughts of home and all the things I perceive that I have given up to come to this far away land.

It is thanksgiving season and Misty and I miss the traditions spent with her family in Tennessee. Soon after this will be Christmas and how we long for the sights and sounds that are associated with this season. We have begun thinking about the food and fellowship that we are leaving behind as well. Salsaritas. How it has just become another hunting season in Texas once more and how I will miss yet another wonderful experience with my boys and friends such as Doc Cawley. How Misty misses her little house in Graham, Texas with its backyard, sidewalks and parks on what seems like every corner. How we miss being able to drive in a car. Chick-Fil-A. How we miss the exciting times in fellowship and growth with both Basswood and Graham Bible Church. How I miss coffee with Pastor Ronnie talking theology and times spent in prayer and pouring out my heart with my dear brother Reagan Kelley. How Misty misses running water and being able to take a bath in water that has not just come out of the sewer. How Misty longs to laugh along so many dear friends and ladies over the most trivial of things. Oh, how I could go on and on for hours.....lol.

What The Lord Is Teaching me:

Now for the cold hard truth. Brothers and sisters..... some how in the course of this month I have lost or better yet allowed my Joy in Christ and His glory to be high jacked and overshadowed with other thoughts. I have allowed sicknesses, stresses, culture and earthly trappings to steal from me what should be my true reason for coming to a land such as this in the first place. I have allowed the age old enemies of the world, the flesh and the devil to distract me from abiding in the true enjoyment of my soul. Namely Christ and His glory and the great privilege that has been given me that I should go fourth as His servant here on earth.

Instead of watching and warring through prayer and abiding in Christ's word, I have simply got busy feeling sorry for myself. As if I have made some sort of sacrifice. One in which the pay off is not seen as worth it. Something that could not be farther from the truth. Jonathan Edwards has written:

“The enjoyment of [God] is the only happiness with which our souls can be satisfied. To go to heaven, fully to enjoy God, is infinitely better than the most pleasant accommodations here. Fathers and mothers, husbands, wives, or children, or the company of earthly friends, are but shadows; but God is the substance. These are but scattered beams, but God is the sun. These are but streams. But God is the ocean.”  - Jonathan Edwards

I am ashamed to admit that in my sickness and stress I had gotten lazy in my pursuit of God. I am ashamed to say that I had allowed Satan to lead me to see all the problems in this culture as issues somehow particular to Indonesians and Muslims and not as it truly is. A problem of sin and a people who are totally lost and helpless apart from a Savior. Ashamed that my focus was brought to the place of earthly joys and happiness and not my overarching abiding joy and happiness in Christ and His glory here on earth. Jonathan Edwards has also written:

“True virtue never appears so lovely as when it is most oppressed; and the divine excellency of real Christianity is never exhibited with such advantage as when under the greatest trials; then it is that true faith appears much more precious than gold, and upon this account is "found to praise and honor and glory.” - Jonathan Edwards

Friends I need your prayers more than ever in recent days. Pray that in difficulties and trails (which in my case are so very trivial to what so many face and experience) that I would be found not in depression, joylessness, bitterness and in stress. Pray that I will have found my sole Joy in Christ alone and His glory and that I will become steadfast in my pursuit to bring God glory in any and every circumstance.

I now wish to leave you with this list below. This list is now placed upon my wall as a guide in helping me remember what is most important as I seek to find my Joy found namely in God alone! My prayer is that you also will fight for joy as well....... Not so much to receive it as in keeping it. Blessings to you all. We truly miss and love you and pray for you continually. 

How Shall We Fight For Joy?: an adapted list from John Piper

1. Realize that authentic joy in Christ is a gift.

2. Realize the joy must be fought for relentlessly.

3. Resolve to attack all known sin in your life.

4. Learn the secret of gutsy conviction - fighting as one in need of grace daily.

5. Realize that the battle is primarily a fight to see God as He truly is.

6. Meditate on the Word of God day and night.

7. Pray desperately and continually for wisdom and an inclination for God.

8. Learn to preach to yourself rather than find satisfaction in merely hearing yourself.

9. Spend time with God-saturated people who will lovingly and honestly spurn you on in this fight.

10. Be patient in the night of God's seeming absence.

11. Get the rest, exercise and proper diet that your body was designed to have.

12. Make a proper use of God's revelation in nature (get outside).

13. Read great books about God and biographies of those who have gone before us.

14. Do the difficult and loving things (witness in truth and mercy) for the sake of others.

15. Get a global vision for the cause of Christ (Pour yourself out for the nations).

Faith Driven Family Conference

It brings me great joy to announce that Pastor Voddie Baucham will be visiting with my family and I in the month of January. Along with brother Baucham, we will also have the great privilege of having one of his fellow elders along with him and one of my fellow elders (Matt - The question and answer panel extraordinaire) from our sending church as well.

I am growing more and more excited with each passing week to have the opportunity to hang out with, learn from and minister with these men during their visit and stay here.

One such ministry endeavor will be to have Pastor Voddie speak at the "Faith Driven Family Conference" an event that we are in the middle of planning here. The sessions will include "The family in the discipleship of the next generation", "What is the gospel" and a special session for Pastor Baucham to preach on whatever the Lord is so leading him to bring to the people of this location.

After learning of his book "Faith Driven Family" (as it is translated here) being translated into this language and being that I am in great support of what is written within its pages, an invitation was made to Pastor Voddie to come visit and speak concerning it's content. I am very grateful for his enthusiastic desire to come and share with many of the folks here who will come under such teaching.

In the weeks leading up to the start of the planning of this event, I had been buying these books and meeting with several pastors, elders and church leaders to give them a copy and discuss it's content. The amount of excitement I have been receiving from these men in regards to the content of this book have been somewhat shocking. There seems to be a real hunger in understanding more concerning how to lead our families for the glory of the Lord here. This is an area in which many here simply do not know and or understand.  Even for those already in church leadership. This is not something that is often times seen in and modeled by men within this culture.

During the week that follows there will be several other ministry endeavors in both the city and in the jungle villages. There will also be moments in which all on this trip will learn concerning the work that is taking place here among those who live here and the needs that are still very much present here as well.

I would ask you all to pray for this week in January. Please, pray for the teaching on the family and the gospel that will be presented in it. Pray, for all those who will come under its teaching. Pray for the three men who will learn and see what our Lord is doing here. Pray for the months in preparations leading up to it. And please pray that above all our Lord and King will be greatly glorified in it. Blessings to you all.

Summer Discipleship

Over the summer months the Lord has been good to bring several young women into our path here. Four of these young girls are from the United States and one a native to this location.

These young girls (American) have come to this location by way of a summer program with a prominent sending organization in the U.S.

Before their coming to this location, I had never met or known anything concerning them. When they arrived here they were to meet up with folks from this org and begin training/learning under them, however, through several circumstances outside everyone's control, they were all left without any leadership in discipleship and oversight. It has been such a rewarding time getting to know these young women deeper and have them within our home as we all open the scriptures together and discuss issues pertaining to our Lord's glory and their involvement in it.

This past weekend I took these young women to a village desa where two believing families (persecuted) reside in the midst of much hardship and difficulties. It was such a wonderful experience to watch how these young women reacted to the stories of these village believers. I was astonished at the raw emotion of our small fellowship that morning as we shared with one to another, read from God's word, prayed for each other and shared a meager meal together.

One young girl stated; "I never thought the Lord we give me such a privilege to meet such committed followers of Jesus Christ, these are heroes of the faith for me and I am honored." What a beautiful picture of God's family was represented and experienced on this day for these young ladies. They learned that with all their knowledge of the scriptures, within all their years spent in Christian activity, with all their being surrounded with church commotion that they still had so much to learn in regards to the faith and our calling to be disciples for Christ's glory here on earth.

I must admit that meeting these young women and experiencing this summer with them is only leading me deeper and deeper into humility. I am increasingly amazed at God's own grace being shed upon me and my home. Who am I that the Lord would have directed these young women my way? What a responsibility, honor and privileged. And who am I that they would even listen to me? The Lord is good and His strengthening hand is constantly before us here. I hope that in some way I will have blessed these young women in someway before they leave. However, I already see how the Lord has blessed me personally with having the opportunity to have met them.

Please continue to pray for Vira, Lauren, Sarah, Natalie and Jamie. Pray that the Lord would shape and continually mold them more and more into his image. Pray that they would receive further wisdom and knowledge into His leading in their lives. Pray for our dear brothers and sisters within this village. Pray for further strength and courage. Pray that they would grow deeper into God and His word as well. Pray for revival in this location and that the Lord will receive the glory do His name.

The Glorious Gospel!

Comments Coming Soon:

Continue To Pray For Us

My Dear Brothers and Sisters in the Lord,


I pray this letter finds you all well and more committed as ever in growing more and more into the likeness of Christ and experiencing further growth in your passion for His glory here on earth. It has been a while since my last letter to you and I must admit, with joy, I find myself writing this discourse to you now. With fond memory, we have thought of you often and in prayer we remember you in what we pray is a season of growth and advancement in the gospel where ever you find yourselves.


We as a family are now entering into a whole new theater of warfare for which we have been seemingly unprepared. The prince of this world does not easily cede his territory to the people of God and in our case there is no difference. It has been said of our enemy the devil; "Be sober-minded, be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour." 1 Peter 5:8.

I fear that in recent days the knife of his lying accusation has dealt a violent blow against me and the sent of my blood has been in his prowling nostril. Satan is a relentless foe and is often more powerful than what we give him credit. In recent days I have been more acquainted with the feelings of helplessness, inadequacy, and confusion more than I would care to admit. The enemy has set before me a continual attack of lies and whispers upon my ear that have left me tired, weary and dry. 

When I see the constant reminder of the state of things here (the lying tongue of these people, the theft of belongings all around me, the gossip in their conversation, the state of the family, the reports of molested children in the (communities), the constant false worship to false gods, the weakness of those churches and leaders who would even call themselves Christians, the mutilation and striping of the gospel in this location and the corruption within this culture that seems to be an everyday norm) I am sometimes overcome with a vision of the enormity of the issues we face here. It has been written by John Bunyan, no stranger to adversity and hardship; 

“It is not what enemies will, nor what they are resolved upon, but what God will, and what God appoints, that shall be done..... And as no enemy can bring suffering upon a man when the will of God is otherwise, so no man can save himself out of their hands when God will deliver him up for his glory..... We shall or shall not suffer, even as it pleaseth him..... God has appointed who shall suffer. Suffering comes not by chance or by the will of man, but by the will and appointment of God.”

It has been the truth of such a declaration as this, that now brings strength to the weariness of my soul. The truth is that in all things God is sovereign. Even in suffering. It is also just as true that in all things God is faithful. Therefore, I can trust Him as he states in His word; “No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation He will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it. 1 Cor. 10:13”

But, the question remains why all the weariness? Why the helplessness? Why the hopelessness? The plain truth is this: I am too at home in doing things in the power of my own strength rather than being in the desperate dependency of the power of God's Spirit. Stillness has always been an issue for me. As well many of you already know. All my life I have wrestled with the thinking that my life would become better or easier “if” or “when”. I struggle with thinking and saying things like; “If only I could speak the language already, then I would be more joyous in my service.” or “If only I already knew more clearly what my task was here then, I would run at ministry harder.” These are lies and thoughts without understanding or wisdom. Listen to what James Fraser missionary to China has written on the subject;

“Well, here in the training home, all my time must be given to language study – how can I do missionary work? But when I am settled down in my situation and able to speak freely, opportunities will be unlimited!”etc etc. It is all if and when. I believe the devil is fond of those conjunctions.... The plain truth is that the Scriptures never teach us to wait for opportunities of service, but to serve in just the things that lie next to our hands.... The Lord bids us work, watch and pray, but Satan suggests, wait until a good opportunity for working presents itself and needless to say, this opportunity is always in the future and never present.”


Brothers and sisters, I believe it will only be known on the last day how much has been accomplished in missionary work by the prayers of earnest believers at home. Will you join in with me and pray as John Bunyan has stated;

“Christian, pray for me to our God with much earnestness, fervency and frequency in all your knockings at our Father's door, because I do very much stand in need thereof, for my work is great, my heart is vile and the devil lieth at watch, the world would fain by saying, Aha, aha, thus would we have it! And of myself, keep myself I cannot, trust myself I dare not; if God do not help me I am sure it will not be long before my heart deceive, and the world [the flesh and the devil] have their advantage of me.”

Two Issues Facing Evangelism #1

 "Sing to the Lord a new song; Sing to the Lord, all the earth. Sing to the Lord, bless His name. Proclaim good tidings of His salvation from day to day. Tell of His glory among the nations, His wonderful deeds among all the peoples."  Psalm 96:1-3 (NASB)

Warning: Nothing Original from this post! Simply a recap in my on thoughts and words concerning an issue that Voddie Baucham deals with in a sermon posted at the end of this entry:

Within our modern church culture there truly seems to be a real tendency to see many trying to redefine what evangelism is and what it looks like in practice today. Within this post I will not be handling the issues of the message we are to proclaim , so much as I will be trying to share my concern with what I would suggest are one of two issues I have been thinking about lately concerning evangelism.

Issue #1. We must open our mouths 

The word evangelism is not ever actually used in the scriptures, however, its office (evangelist) is used several times in connection to those who do the work of proclaiming the message of the Gospel (Acts 21:8, Ephesians 4:11, 2 Timothy 4:5). This word for evangelist  comes from the Koine Greek word (transliterated = euangelion) which is also synonymous with the word Gospel itself meaning (eu- "good", -angelion "message" or "good news").

What is most interesting concerning this literal meaning is the use of the word "news". How does one receive news? How is news given? Is it not with either a form of written words or communication with ones mouth? Whether from a written text such as a news paper, magazine, book or even a audible form of communication such as radio, television or even from someones very own mouth in conversation? 

When in several discussions with many brothers and sisters concerning this issue of true biblical evangelism always proceeding the proclaiming, declaring and telling of this gospel "good news" with one's mouth/actual words (except in the case of the written proclamation of course). I am always met with this quote by Saint Francis of Asisi;

"Preach the gospel at all times and when necessary use words."

I would suggest we must always use words! And that this quote above no matter how pretty sounding it may be and how easy it is to remember, it is just completely lacking. Many today want to remind me at this point that the way we live our lives is important and I would not be in disagreement one bit with that thinking. The way we live our lives is very important. The issue I have is that we have (like this quote) placed everything out of order and it is high time we seek to do the proper rearranging. 

We do not simply live "good", moral and happy lives to be able to preach the gospel (if we are even preaching anything at all). However, we as Christians are to preach the gospel always and make sure our lifestyles do not contradict those claims and bring shame and upon God's glory and our message. Like this quote, many want to point out to me that our lives are the gospel and that we are to communicate everyday by the way we live those lives who God is. 

My reply: You cannot live the gospel! Why? Because, as we have already established and stated the gospel is "news". And "good news" as that. News that we have all been created by an infinitely holy, righteous and just God. That we all have sinned against this God in action, attitude and nature and will therefore be punished upon that day when He will judge the world in righteousness (His  holy standard of good/perfect). The news that all our attempts to please God fall desperately short. The news that apart from a Savior we are all likewise doomed. The wonderful news that God has sent Jesus Christ (God in flesh) to pay the price that we could not pay (death on a cross as the perfect, sinless Savior). This Jesus having then  been raised from the dead three days later conquering sin and death and now imparts His own righteousness upon all those who believe and are converted into this new life in the presence of the Father. 

Question:  How can you give such news (and this was condensed mind you) with simply living your life without the use of words? Let me ask this question another way. Could you today read the front page of your local news paper and if I asked you to wake up tomorrow and communicate all that was handled and written within those articles with your friends and family, could you do that simply by living your life without the use of words? If you are truthful with yourself, you know that there would be know way for you to do such a thing. Yet, somehow we have come to believe apparently this Gospel "good news" has become so simple and shallow that the living of our lives apart from the preached words of the gospel from our lips can somehow penetrate the hearts, minds and souls of our loved ones. 

Let us see what the scriptures have to "say" about such issues:

"How then will they call on Him in whom they have not believed? How will they believe in Him whom they have never heard? And how will they hear without a preacher? How will they preach unless they are sent? Just as it is written, "How beautiful are the feet that bring good news." (17) "So, faith comes from hearing, and hearing the word of Christ." Romans 10:14-16,17)

"[Paul's Prayer] And pray on my behalf, that utterance may be given to me in the opening of my mouth, to make known with boldness the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains; that in proclaiming it I may speak boldly, as I ought to speak." Ephesians 6:19-20

"For the word of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God. (21) For since in the wisdom of God the world through it's wisdom did not come to know God, God was well pleased through the foolishness of the message preached to save those who believe." 1 Corinthians 1:18,21

"Give ear, O heavens, and let me speak; And let the earth hear the words of my mouth. Let my teaching drop as the rain. My speech distill as the dew, As the droplets on the fresh grass and as the shower on the herb. For I proclaim the name of the Lord." Duet. 32:1-3

"My mouth shall tell of Your righteousness and of Your salvation all day long; For I do not know the sum of them. I will come with the mighty deeds of the Lord God; I will make mention of Your righteousness, Yours alone." Psalm 71:15-16

"Sing to the Lord a new song, Sing His praise from the end of the earth! You who go down to the sea, and all that is in it. You islands, and those who dwell on them. Let the wilderness and its cities lift up their voices. The settlements where Kedar inhabits. Let the inhabitants of Sela sing aloud, Let them shout for joy from the tops of the mountains. Let them give glory to the Lord and declare His praise in the coast lands."  Isaiah 42:10-13

Again we are to live "Godly in Christ Jesus" and we should allow are lives to communicate to others how Christ has changed our hearts and given us victory in this life. However, this is merely to strengthen our witness in proclamation, not in becoming a substitute for using our mouths. Again, we do not live our lives as the proclamation of God's gospel (news). We preach the gospel and pray desperately that are lives do not contradict that which we preach.

In my next post I will be discussing an issue in evangelism that is the opposite of not opening one's mouth in evangelism. It will deal more with those who practice the proclamation of the gospel who in my opinion are doing more harm than good. I am growing more and more increasingly concerned with what I am seeing in much of what I see in this area as well and seek to bring a healthy (biblical) balance between the two. Meaning: Establishing that we all must open our mouths for the gospel but, that how we do that and in what strength we do that is just as important.

Click on this image below and check out this great sermon by brother Voddie Baucham dealing with many of these issues and the gospel itself. I must admit it was this sermon that lit a fire under my seat to begin thinking on this issue further. One that is becoming more and more regular for me here in this part of the world.

Were Back From the Jungle!

I have just arrived back from a survey trip out to Papua with two dear friends (elders) from two supporting churches back in the States. What a blessing to have both Ronnie and Reagan along for this most important and rewarding trip.

We arrived in Sentani by plane and spent two days within the town preaching and teaching at a local GIDI church located there. We then boarded a prop plane out into the Memberamo region of fuau. A most remote location with very little outside contact. We spent two days in the locations as well teaching and preaching the gospel and meeting villagers there.

After our time there we took a 13 hours dug out canoe trip up the river to Debra, where we once again visited with locals, taught/preached the gospel and surveyed the land. This was a most joyous location as 32 villagers received Christ as their Lord and Savior. Only time will tell and reveal the true nature of their conversions. Please, continue to pray for these who still have yet to receive the bible in their own language and those who continually beg for a gospel/bible teacher to come and live among them.

Once again after about three days there, we were once again in a plane headed for Kaso and the Burmeso regions. We once again spent time teaching/preaching the gospel there and visiting and encouraging local believers.

I once again want to thank Trevor J, Brother Yuli, Ronnie B, Reagan K and both the fellowships of Basswood Church Knoxville, TN and Graham Bible Church Graham, TX for making this all possible. God bless you all and may He continue to use you all for His glory in your communities and ultimately the world!

Can You Be Alone With God?

"I know your works. You have the reputation of being alive, but you are DEAD. Wake up and strengthen what remains and is about to die, for I have not found your works complete in the sight of my God." Rev. 3:1a-2

Within the past year the Lord has been teaching me much about myself. Some of these teachings and truths have been both re-affirming and encouraging. However, some have been down right unnerving and difficult to accept and learn concerning myself. I know that all that the Lord is teaching and showing me is good. I know that all these things are aspects of further mercy and grace in my life as well. However, not all that I learn always feels good in the moment (Hebrews 12:11).

I am growing more and more convinced that most of what Christians today (especially in American culture) call healthy in regards to their relationship with Christ is often times surrounded more with misconceptions and deceptions rather than the truth and the power of God's word. Let me use my own life as an example and be brutally honest, even confessional with you all in explaining this issue.

Psalm 46 describes a God who is active, who is in motion, who is in control. Even when so much around us seems to scream out to us, seeks to distract us, and blind us to these truths, God is still at work in and amongst them all. Then in verse 10 something profoundly powerful and clear is written;
"BE STILL and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth."

I must admit... This "BE STILL" thing is not something that characterizes me often. The honest truth is that, I have often prided myself in being a doer, a goer, a man with a mission, someone who is active in his allegiance to Christ. And in many ways these can be great qualities in a servant of Christ. Truth be told we need more who are willing to risk much and do much for God and His glory today. However, in my case and within the past year the Lord is teaching me something very shocking concerning myself. All this doing, all this going and all this motion has for a large part blinded me from my true spiritual condition.

You see in America I was pastor and on staff at a church. I taught/preached the word at least four times a week. Studied the scriptures constantly in preparation for these moments of teaching/preaching. Counseled with believers constantly on the phone, at my house, or at church itself. Prayed for constant help and guidance from the Lord as to my dealing with them. I was active in sharing the gospel in evangelism and constantly sought to learn God's word in dealing with those who are lost. I attended bible studies, home group meetings and even conferences when the opportunity presented itself. I attended mission trips (leading most of them) Honduras, Kenya and Mexico. Once even taking the gospel to a remote tribe within the jungle who had never heard the message of God's grace in Jesus before. I was a man on mission, a man of action and a man who felt a since of closeness and maturity in my walk with the Lord.

However, eight months ago all this was over in one single move. In coming here (a land not my own) all these things (teaching, preaching, evangelism, bible studies, home fellowships, conferences and even counseling others) have been stripped away from me during this season of my life (still learning the language). In effect the Lord has placed me in a position and place where I have been forced to get still before our God. What I am learning concerning all this brings me much shame, yet joy in knowing that our Father is bringing such knowledge to my soul.

What am I learning? What I am learning is this....... I stink at getting still!.... I am horrible at being alone with God! When all the commotion, when all the activities and all that we call ministry even (and most of these are great things) have for a moment ceased in my life, so has ceased for a great part my communion with our great Lord. I had let all these actions, activities and doings define me as a Christian. I had simply studied, read the word and prayed because I had enough wisdom to know that apart from Christ I could do nothing. I was not studying his word and praying desperately because He simply was enough for me. Not because my soul found rest and joy in Him alone.

George Mueller has once written; "I saw more clearly than ever, that the first great and primary business to which I ought to attend every day was, to have my soul happy in the Lord. The first thing to be concerned about was not, how much I might serve the Lord, how I might glorify the Lord; but how I might get my soul into a happy state, and how my inner man may be nourished... I saw that the most important thing I had to do was to give myself to the reading of the word of God and to meditation on it."

Christian, this is my great fear for many who profess Christ today. I am not making reference to those who do so little, risk so little and have so little concern for God's glory today. My fear in this post is for all you who find yourselves at the church every time the doors are open. Those of you who read constantly books about God. Attend conference after conference. Who pride yourself in your evangelism. Those of you who handle the word in teaching/preaching. Those of you who attend mission trips.............. How well are you at being alone with God? How are you this day spending quality time with the lover of your soul? Are you drinking deeply His word? Are you reading for a chance at seeing your Christ or preparing you for some function? Are you thrusting yourself at His feet in prayer simply to thank Him and worship Him or are you constantly, if you are praying seeking more stuff (whether spiritual or physical) for yourself from Him? Have you in pride (like myself) allowed your actions and doings define you in your walk as a disciple or are you defined as His disciple because you spend much time with your master?

So here I am. The Lord has brought me to this place in my life and is teaching me that in my service (which was really nothing more than subtle pride), I have somehow forgotten my first love. I have been blinded to the fact that I was merely reading scripture (not always, but it was present) to have myself prepared, rather than to meet with my Savior. I was in prayer for greater power in what I was doing, rather than simply speaking to a Father who deserves my undivided attention in conversation and praise.

Before brother Paul Washer left here a few months ago, he gave me advice to calm down, meet with our Lord through the study and reading of His word, pray desperately, learn this language well and love my family and wash them in both the word and prayer as well. I am ashamed to say that it has taken me this long to recognize the importance of such issues until now. I have been running and chasing after so many other (old actions that defined me) issues, that I was forsaking these others.

Will you please, join in with me and ask the Father to renew this weak, dry and broken vessel? Will you join with me and pray that the Lord would do even now a further work of sanctification in my life? My question to you, as I have asked myself is, Can you dear brother and sister be alone with God?

"Remember that it is not hasty reading, but serious meditation on holy and heavenly truths, that makes them prove sweet and profitable to the soul. It is not the mere touching of the flower by the bee that gathers honey, but her abiding there for a time on the flower that draws out the sweet. It is not he that reads most, but he that meditates most, that will prove to be the choicest, sweetest, wisest, and strongest of Christian." Thomas Brooks

A Need For Discernment!

The original Video has been taken down from YouTube therefore, I have added this David Platt Video in response to the teachings that were present in the Rob Bell video.

I must admit as I watched this video, I was shocked! Not shocked because Rob Bell had taught something not keeping with scripture (he has always been known for this). However, that even he would have departed from biblical and historical Christianity as far as it seems that he just has. Is Rob Bell a Universalist? Did he truly hint that God is to loving to send anyone to hell? Did he just hint that God was not one to be feared and that we do not need salvation from His just wrath? From this video it would sound very much so. One of the great causes for concern is that this man has a huge following among many people today (mostly young) and yet they drink what he says says up like water. All while he is denying many aspects of the very gospel all together.

Charles Spurgeon has once written; "Discernment is not a matter of simply telling the difference between right and wrong, rather, it is telling the difference between right and almost right." 

I would say that this is something that I see within most of the ministry and teaching of Rob Bell. He is often found teaching some profound text of the bible, however, it is what is intermingled in with it that makes it so poisonous. With Rob Bell (along with so many others today) you really have to beware of what Spurgeon calls the "almost right" of what is taught. In the case of this video however, it is very clear and plain that Rob Bell is teaching out right heresies. 

Of false teaching J.C Ryle has written;  "That old enemy of mankind, the devil, has no more subtle device for ruining souls than that of spreading false doctrine. Outside the church he is ever persuading men to maintain destructive superstitions. Like a pirate, his object is to sink, burn and destroy. Inside the church he is ever laboring to sow heresies, to propagate errors, to bring faster departures from the faith. If he cannot prevent the waters flowing from the fountain of life, he tries hard to poison them. If he cannot destroy the medicine of the gospel, he strives to adulterate and corrupt it."

Sadly, Discernment is a word and trait that I would not say often times characterizes many confessing Christians today. So many continue to hold teachers and their words/teaching (books, videos and articles) up over scripture itself and the historical truths of the gospel. When I watched this video I was only further reminded of the fact that so many today have forsaken the Bible and are going the way of 2 Timothy 4:3-5; 

"For the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions and will turn away from listening to the truth and wonder off into myths." 

Again listen to the words of J.C Ryle; "Heart-religion in too humbling to be popular. It leaves natural man no room to boast. It tells him, that he is a guilty, lost, hell-deserving sinner, and that he must flee to Christ for salvation. It tells him that he is dead, and must be made alive again, and born of the spirit (Regeneration). The pride of man rebels against such tidings as these. He hates to be told that his case is so bad." 

Believer, beware, such subtle and in some cases like these represented in this video non-subtle teachings are present everywhere we turn. I am often surprised at much of what has been (false teaching/thinking) transferred even to this country from the States. These days you must hold scripture close to your heart/soul and pray continually for true biblical discernment. We are not living in a day where you can be so half hearted in knowing the scriptures.

I could spend all day in this post and speak of so many things that cause me concern today. However, today I simply do not have the time. I want close this post with a good recommendation for a book on the subject of Discernment.

In "The Discipline of Spiritual Discernment" Tim Challies digs into the practical theology of how to see growth in the area of spiritual discipline within the believers life. He strongly admonishes the follower of Christ in this age of easy believism, man centered-ness, and worldly approaches to discern well truth from error and right from wrong. Or, as he puts it, this book "is written for all those who believe that it is the duty of every Christian to think biblically about all areas of life so that they might act biblically in all areas of life."